Spiritual courage

There is a Jewish tradition that a couple are newlyweds for a full year. One way to celebrate this is for the couple to dip their Shabbat challah in honey, rather than salt. This is such a simple way for a couple to remind each other that they have chosen to be together, and chosen to live a Jewish life, even if the only ritual they share is Shabbat.

Honestly, this would be so easy in Israel where Jewishness exudes from the very rocks, echos down the corridors, flows in with the ocean waves, and follows my every step. In the US however assimilation beckons at every corner. Really. Try to guard Shabbat for just half day. Try explaining that you do spend a full day in temple for Yom Kippur, and no you are not available for a meeting on Rosh Hashanah. Even better, try to explain why you wanted a Jewish wedding after 25 years of marriage

I have found that people still question my return to Judaism, wondering why I just don't proclaim my spirituality without the framework or laws or restrictions. These have been interesting conversations. In the end I talk about being spiritually courageous and tenacious, being willing to be challenged by this journey, to grow through study and commitment.

There is an old Hassidic story that reminds us that the way to change our world, or our village, or our family, is to start with our own self. We cannot change others, we can only change ourselves. However, when we change ourselves, we change the world. Spiritual courage starts here, with honest self examination and the willingness to take responsibility for our actions.  Any spiritual path can be frightening as we face our own internal demons and weaknesses and strive to live out our best self. But facing this fear, struggling with my limits helps make me a stronger person.

Being spiritually tenacious, hanging on to beliefs in the face of criticism or easy assimilation, helps me “lean towards the good,” a Jewish notion that we always have free choice in our actions.  It is the same tenacity that helps me seek the positive in a situation, remembering the teachings of Victor Frankl that in any situation I have the freedom to determine my attitude and spiritual well-being. I am not suggesting that this is easy, but it is something I strive for, and that Jewish rituals help me with.

So why do I find value in these Jewish traditions? Because exploring the meaning of these customs helps me walk a spiritual path. The Hebrew word for law is Halacha...which actually means walking. So the laws and rules are not just limits, they are suggestions for ways to walk through this world.

This year Ric and I are starting this walk by dipping our bread in honey and remembering why we held an I-do-re-do in the Jewish tradition.