The gift of a glue gun

I had no idea that a pile of shells, some wire and ribbon,  a selection of fresh water pearl beads, and a glue gun could bring people together in such a fun and profound way. I brought in all the elements for the mermaid shell bouquet and asked the staff at Regis if they would like to help me put this together. We do not have a pattern or a plan, just a sense that mermaids would carry long stem sea bouquets made of shells and pearls. So we started there.

Life has been a bit tense at work. We are in an area under going remodeling so we are dealing with dust and loud bangs and the sound of drilling and smells and temperamental air conditioning. The outside temps have been in the 100's, and the inside atmosphere has been stressful. Who knew that a craft project could bring us together and make us laugh. Who knew that a glue gun could connect people's hearts.

 People came and went and gathered and drifted and returned to show work and to laugh. Each person made one "long stem flower" for the bouquet, or one leaf, or one other element. No rules, no pattern, no plan, no way to do this wrong. Just laughter and a glue gun. Just the freedom to create an individual piece that would stand alone, and add beauty to the whole. 

In some ways today was extraordinary. This was more than a craft project; this was a spontaneous expression of friendship. This was a "Regis Spring." A group of people came together to joyfully express the power of creative freedom. There was no critique, no assessment, no rubric, no portfolios, no oversight. No one was more creative than anyone else. No one had a better idea.

 This was academic freedom at work.


This was also an amazing gift. I had an idea. My mermaid soul wanted sea shells and pearls and the color turquoise, and magically a group of people came together and created something that matched the song in my heart. 

 I have been at more team building retreats than I can count, climbing and jumping and zipping and testing, and talking and sharing and discussing and retreating and pulling away, and on and on and on. And on and on. And on. All of these started with good intentions...at least I think they did. But in so many ways they fell flat. They were contrived. They were awkward. They were always about the group without

 thought to the needs or strengths of the individual. Someone shouted from the front of the room "there is no I in team" and I wanted to leave. If there is no "I" then what am I doing here?


Today there were lots of "I's" in the room. Lots of individual voices joining in the symphony of laughter. So many people 

 willing to bring their best creative self to the table to create a gift for my wedding. 


I then I got it. This is the message of the Jewish wedding. There are two individuals who agree to to bring their best selves together for the good of each other. Not to become ONE PERSON, but to stay TWO people, each with different gifts and roles and strengths and weaknesses, committed to the dance of marriage. And these two people, who stay individuals 

 but commit to a union, do so in the presence of a community, and as part of the community. 


I can bring my best self to the marriage and know that Ric is doing the same. And that this marriage, this union of two spirits creates an energy, a force for good that was not there before. And as this creative energy grows, it dances through the community inspiring and enlightening and enlivening the community at large. And yet each of us is still a marvelous and unique individual. 

 Just as each stem in the bouquet will carry a makers mark, an individual flair reminding me who made it, each individual in a marriage, or in a community, adds a necessary and unique element that transforms and informs the whole. We are meant to live our soul's message, to be unique voices in the cacophony of our communities, and our relationships. Perhaps that is the only measure we really 

need, a measure of how we are being our true  self.


The individual flowers are still growing. I can't wait to see the beauty of each. I know that they will be magnificent together.